Projects, Problems, and Progress

"Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love Him." -James 1:12 (ESV)

Project Queen...
When I was in school, I was the nerd excited to shop for new school supplies. Crisp, unblemished notebook paper, pens that still had lids that would soon be lost, folders in a rainbow of colors, I loved it all. My backpack was stocked and ready to go long before the first day of school arrived. When I was pregnant with my daughter, I was eager to learn everything that I possibly could about pregnancy, childbirth, and parenting. Books were purchased, websites perused, advice sought. Though I do not regret at all preparing the best I could in both of these instances, I soon discovered each time that school and pregnancy are not neat, quick projects like organizing a junk drawer or redoing a closet. They were ongoing processes that required constant learning, reevaluating ideas, patience, and perseverance when the "newness" of it all faded.

From pens to problems...
Herein is my primary struggle in spiritual growth. Just watch me devise a schedule for Bible reading, purchase a new book on the area I need help in most (trust me, there are many problem areas I could choose from), stock up on pens, paper, and highlighters for study, download my Christian music on iTunes, and get ready for God to rock my world. At that point, I am like, "Hey, God, we are good to go. We've got this."

Then comes the hard part for me. Kind of like October in school when homework, studying, tests, and projects kicked in like a spur into a horse, and this horse was longing for Christmas break...or better yet, summer break to appear. Or like twenty-five weeks into my pregnancy when the "We're having a baby!" and the "We're having a girl!" thrills faded into, "We have a looooong time to go before this baby girl arrives." I am all for partnering with God in the change and growth process necessary for every Christian in life, but my faith and determination are truly tested when messy, "unplannable" (yes, I like to make up words) reality stomps all over my clean, organized schedule.

Lessons from the University of Hard Knocks...
"Patience, God? You want to work on that with me? Sure, let me go buy a book on that topic. After I read the book, highlight the portions that would get an 'Amen' or two in church, and post a few sentences from it on Facebook, I'll be cured of impatience, right?" Ha! I wish. More accurate would be, "Yes, child. Let's work on patience. That molasses-slow driver, whiny toddler, dead cell phone battery, snippy cashier, and bright blue ink stain on the shirt you plan to wear today are your first lesson. I will be here for you to lean on and will supply every ounce of patience you need to endure it all, if you seek to receive it. Ready for class to begin?" Honestly, I laugh to myself typing that, but let me tell you, when all that and more piles on, as we say in the South, it ain't a bit funny, y'all!

Bible reading is a must. Reading godly books written by trustworthy, in-the-Word authors are a tremendous help to me. Christian music ministers to my heart in a major way. However, what I do with all the knowledge that I have gleaned from those sources in combination with instruction from the Holy Spirit when classes are in session at the "University of Hard Knocks" and how many times I allow God to pick me up and place me back in my proverbial desk for another lesson is what makes or breaks my progress with God.

The good news!
Are you wondering when I get to the "firefighter saves kitten trapped in tree" kind of good news that we all long to hear? The answer is now. Yes, growth in God is tough, messy, and often painful, but it is worth it. Consider nursing school and basic training for the military. Neither are for the faint of heart; if you are going to make it through, you have to want it, want it bad, and be willing to put in the time, energy, and pain it takes to succeed. Why are those programs so demanding? They have to be, because those people will hold the power of life and death in their hands, and those who teach them need to make sure they are at the fit to handle that enormous responsibility. As Christians, the same concept applies. The difference is that nurses and military personnel deal with physical life and death (and thank God that they do), but as children of the Most High King, we carry the accountability of spreading the news of how our God offers eternal spiritual life to save the world from everlasting death and destruction in hell. We, too, must be challenged and tested to ensure that we are in the spiritual shape needed to serve our Savior and reach a lost world for Him.

The other part of the good news? Like the military, we have comrades fighting and learning right alongside us. We also have an Instructor, and though sometimes He has every right to be, He is no drill sergeant. He is strength, power, and perseverance. He is also mercy, grace, and love, love, love. He never gives up on His children. He never walks away. He never gives us a failing grade. As someone quite wittily once said, "You never fail the tests of God. You get to take them over...and over...and over....and over...and over..." Thank God for retests! :)

Prayer
Lord, thank you for choosing us, loving us, and teaching us. God, we all know that growth in You is not always easy or pleasant, but remind us that it is always, always, always worth it. Help us to be heavenly minded and seek to see Your bigger plan rather than just our small, earthly ones. For me personally, enable me to stop viewing Your lessons as a project that I can control and accomplish neatly on my own. I pray that I would not back down or give up when life gets messy as it often does, but that I would trust in You to help me clean it up in Your way, in Your time, and in Your power. God, we are nothing on our own, but we are more than we could possibly imagine in You. Remind us of that daily, I pray, in Jesus's name, Amen!

From Betrayed Back To Trust

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight." -Proverbs 3:5-6

Betrayed...
"I can't believe I ever trusted you!" How many times have we all heard these words? Maybe we heard an actress scream them through a veil of fake tears at her costar in a movie about betrayal. Maybe we heard a man bellow them at his soon-to-be ex-girlfriend in the grocery store parking lot in a fit of rage. Maybe we even heard ourselves utter those words in excruciating pain over the actions of the one person we thought "would never let us down." There is no accurate description for the shocking agony that comes with the  realization that a belief we had about someone in our life was based on a complete and total lie. Unfortunately, it is a safe assumption that I do not have to attempt to explain that devastation to anyone reading this post, because at some place, at some time in our lives, someone has let each of us down in some way.

Backstabbed...
Ever had a trusted friend that revealed a humiliating secret about you after promising to never tell? Or had a relied upon significant other who was seeing someone else on the sly, all the while assuring you that "there could never be anyone else"? Or had a child that threw a fit about how you never believe anything they say when it would later be uncovered that what they were claiming at the time was in no way the truth? I do not ask these questions to bring up painful memories for anyone, but to remind us that in some way or another, we have all experienced loss of trust in others, whether temporary or permanent, whether their mistake was an innocent slip-up or an intentional scar inflicted upon us.

Bruised...
Betrayal happens here on this imperfect soil tread by imperfect humans. It happens, and, oh, does it hurt. At best, betrayal can cause us to be aware of the sin in this world, in others, and in ourselves, and draw us closer to the only One who truly will never let us down and who can heal our gaping wounds caused by the pain of it all: God. At worst, it causes us to run and hide from the world that we are so incredibly sick of knocking us down, try with all our might to thicken our skin and harden our hearts, and start to believe that the only one who can pick us up and keep us up...is us and us alone. The devil begins to whisper in his alluring, falsely soothing voice something like this, "God controls everything. And he didn't prevent that person who you loved with all your heart from hurting YOU? He must not care...how could he after allowing something like that? He's just like the others....you can't trust him..."

Believing lies...
It almost makes me tear up to type those words, because Satan has breathed them into my ear more than once, and sadly, often without realizing it, I have been guilty of taking them to heart. Deciding that if no one else is going to protect me and my heart, I will. Me and my understanding, my ways, my plans....we will. Oh, friends, I am here to tell you that it does not work, does not bring peace, does prevent pain, and certainly does not offer the abundant life that Christ offers us (John 10:10).

Back to the truth...back to trust

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart.." Turning over our bruised feelings, wounded pride, battered emotions, and broken heart over to the One who created it and can and will heal it in His way and His time

"...and lean not on your own understanding..." Turning over our carefully prepared plans, fearful ideas about what is to come, and  knowledge based on what we see to the One who knows all and sees all, from the very beginning of time to eternity; read Isaiah 55:8-9

"...in all your ways submit to Him..." Turning over what we want to think, believe, say, and do to the One who knows what effect those actions will have on us and the world around us; when we genuinely seek Him about what to do and when, He is faithful to tell us (read Matthew 7:7-8)

"...and He will make your paths straight..." Turning over our desires for a painless path, a controlled-by-us path to the One who knows the path that leads to righteousness, holiness, and godliness...the One who will hold our hand every step down that path, pick us up every time we fall, and never betray us or let us down...despite all the lies the devil may spout to the contrary


Prayer
Dear Heavenly Father, Thank You so very much that you promise many times to never leave us nor forsake us. Thank You that Your Word assures us that You do not lie or change Your mind (Numbers 23:19). What You say, You mean. We can trust in You, even when we can trust in no one else. That being said, God, You know how much betrayal by others and other disappointments in this life hurt us. How they tempt us to turn from what we know to be true to what we think we can control on our own. We ask that you heal each and every person reading this that is broken and bruised from trusting in someone or something that let them down. Wrap Your everlasting, loving arms around that person and remind them that though men, women, boys, and girls will disappoint us on this Earth, You, Our Father in Heaven never will. And that You can bring restoration and guidance to the lives of Your children whenever we seek it in truth and in humility. Thank You for all that You are and all that You do for us. We love You. In Jesus's name, Amen!

What About You?

"God said to Moses, 'I AM WHO I AM...'" -Exodus 3:14

Recently God has truly pressed upon my heart that this time period...this century...this year...this month...today...right now is the time in which we must decide how much we truly believe the truths we claim to stand upon.

We say that God is our Provider. Will we trust Him to be so as unemployment skyrockets, national debt escalates rapidly, stock markets plummet, and the dollar becomes more and more worthless with each passing day? 

We say that God is our Healer. Will we trust Him to be so as life-threatening illnesses become more and more common, some diseases are still incurable by doctors, and many health problems are not preventable by our actions as far as we know? 

We say that God is our Leader. Will we trust Him to be so when national, state, and local ones often fail, whether by legal standards or moral ones, to lead in a way that is best for those they are leading? 

We say that God is our Great Physician. Will we trust Him to be so when so many doctors and nurses are limited by unreasonable insurance regulations, when insurance and/or medical treatments are sometimes in no humanly way affordable, when it seems as if the healthcare system is being severely jeopardized by politics? 

We say that God is our Peace. Will we trust Him to be so when our televisions, radios, newsfeeds, text messages, and emails are flooded with horrific news that brings distress, worry, anguish, and fear? 

We say that God is our Ultimate Victor. Will we trust Him to be so when we witness defeat in so many areas on a daily basis? 

We say that God is Everlasting. Will we trust Him to be so when bombarded with temporal problems that fight, scratch and claw for our attention and focus? 

We say that God is Faithful. Will we trust Him to be so when our nation as a whole...and often we as individuals...are faithless?  

We say that God is with us, for us, and within us. Will be trust Him to be so when it feels at times that no one is with us, no one is for us, and fear is rampant within us? 

We say that God is all we need. Will be trust Him to be so when He is all we have? 

We have said many times that we believe all of that. We have sung about it, posted about it, "Amen'ed" it, wore T-shirts that displayed it....but how much do we truly trust in it? The proving time is here for us all...right now. I want to be someone who proves that God is who He says He is and who I say He is. What about you?

Does Your Attitude Match Your Earrings?

"You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in Heaven." -Matthew 5:14-16

Comforted by cross earrings

Just like I have snapped a million quick pictures over the years with my iPod touch, my mind mentally recorded a snapshot of this woman's earrings. It was not that they were especially adorable, though they were cute, but rather that they were reassuring to me. Reassuring? Earrings? That would admittedly sound a little nutty if I left out the part where I told you that the woman wearing the earrings was a nurse, and, at the time, I was undergoing a medical test that was extremely frightening to me. Rest assured all was well then and is now, but at the time, my mind was filled with innumerable fears and worries concerning the possible results. Why were her earrings reassuring? Hanging from each one was a silver cross. She was a fellow Jesus girl. Was I glad to know that she was well-trained in her profession? Of course. Did I appreciate her effort in making small talk to ease the silence? Yes. But it nothing gave me more peace than those small symbols of faith dangling in front of me and the hope that this woman caring for my life trusted Jesus with hers. 

After the test results came back clear and my mind actually had room to hold another thought, I began to consider those earrings and how they affected me in that situation. I had no misconceptions that they were ironclad proof of her salvation, but they did give me reason to believe that she had faith in the Savior that died on a cross like the one symbolized by her accessories and that, get this, she would make all attempts to act like Him. 

Powerful jewelry and powerful truth 

Whew, that is some powerful jewelry! And a powerful truth, one that none of us can afford to miss. When I was in high school, W.W.J.D bracelets were wildly popular, and the trend quickly spread to T-shirts, hats, everything on which the acronym could be printed. It stood for: "What would Jesus do?" Although it was a question designed to prompt the wearer to ask themselves if what they were about to engage in was godly, I often failed to remember that it was also a statement. A statement to the outside world that told them: "I WANT to and WILL DO MY BEST to do what Jesus would do." 

Looking back, it is frightening to consider how often I wore jewelry that labeled me as a follower and imitator of Jesus with no regard to how my words and actions might negate that statement. Now I am humbled by the notion that no matter what my T-shirt, bumper sticker, or necklace may look like, I still proudly wear the label "Christian" and need to seek to, through God's help, be an accurate reflection of Him to the world. 

Labeled as the light

Before you go donate all of your cross jewelry and Jesus T-shirts to Goodwill out of fear of not living up to the faith you display with your accessories and clothing, hear me out. The moment we accept Jesus into our hearts through faith as Lord and Savior, God himself labels us as His: His children, His redeemed, His heirs (see Romans 8:17). He desires for us to display that label and His love for all the world to see. Matthew 5:14-16 reads, "You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in Heaven." 

Fear not

Does that scare you? Granted it can be intimidating to know that we weak, imperfect humans are to be reflections of a omnipotent, perfect God, but we do not have to be afraid of the task. Earlier when I mentioned my W.W.J.D-wearing days being frightening to look back on, that was solely because I did not take the responsibility and honor of being a Christian and being "Jesus to the world" seriously. THAT is what should put some holy fear in us: disregard for the amazing task we have been entrusted with, which is ultimately living our lives to love, glorify, and serve God and lead others to Him (see Matt. 28:16-20, Matt. 22:36-40, 1 Samuel 12:24). However, when we desire whole-heartedly to do God's will and taking our commitment to Him seriously, we need not worry about being inadequate. God enables and empowers us to do every single thing He calls us to. As Philippians 2:13 reminds us, "for it is GOD who works IN you to will and act in order to fulfill His good purpose" (emphasis mine). He has more than enough power for us all; He just asks that we surrender our will to His and our weakness to Him. 

Don't miss this 

Before I let you go, I would be remiss if I did not add this caveat (which is a fancy word that I love that basically means "warning of specific limitations"). Cross earrings, Christian t-shirts, Facebook statuses about Jesus...none of it means we will be perfect. Unfortunately, some people wrongly assume that anyone who wears the label (whether visible to people on clothing or visible to God and others on your heart) "Christian" should never fail, never fall, never posses one little flaw...and God help you if you do. But you know what? They are partially correct on that last part: God WILL help you WHEN you do. The world may offer insults and condemnation, but He offers victory when we fail, a hand to help us up when fall, and forgiveness for each and every flaw. Which will you trust in? 

Prayer

Dear Heavenly Father, thank You that failing, fallen, and flawed though we can be, You still chose us to reflect Your light onto this dark world. Help us to never forget what an enormous honor and responsibility that is. Also, remind us daily that we never once have to face this world alone. You go before us, behind us, beside us, and, most importantly, inside us to enable us to do Your work and Your will. You are such a good God, and we love You so very much. In Jesus's name, Amen! 

Cats, Criticism, and Calvary

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." -Ephesians 4:29

Who is your "Cat-person"? 

Do you have a person (or people, as the case may be) in your life that pounces on every opportunity to verbally attack you? A person who behaves like a cat that sneaks up on an unsuspecting mouse and leaps toward it, focused, hissing, claws out, going in for the kill? If you consider those words dramatic, I am going to assume that you, in fact, do not know a "Cat-woman" or "Cat-man". I sincerely hope that you have not had the intense displeasure of feeling like someone sees you as a target, as their "mouse." Sadly, during conversations with friends and acquaintances, I have been repeatedly informed that I am not the only one. There are others who have limped away from a conversation battered and bruised by intentionally hurtful "jokes", barbed comments, blatant put-downs, fierce criticisms, the list goes on and on. 

Disclaimer ahead... 

Allow me to issue an "ugly truth" disclaimer here: Yes, I have allowed and sometimes forced words out of this mouth (or through these hands if typing/texting) that no doubt cut someone else to the bone and/or made them angry to the core. Yes, in the past, I have done so on purpose. And, yes, goodness, yes, I hate that. God has regular much-needed talks with me about how I talk, about how I wield the power of words, about whether I speak blessings or curses into the lives of others. Now, I can honestly assert that, though at times I permit my temper to fire off words instead of seeking God to cool me down, any hurt that I bring to others in conversation is not intentional and deeply regretted after the fact. 

What on Earth do we do? 

The issue at hand, however, is not every single person on this Earth, saved or not, that makes mistakes and injures another in the process. I am referring to those who truly seek to bring pain to other people, for whatever reason, and by all appearances feel no remorse about their actions. What on Earth do we do about those people, Lord? He has heard that question as often from me as I hear the word "Mommy" in my household. Well....not that much, but a lot, I can assure you. 

You're not alone

When I ask, He takes me back to the time that our perfect Jesus walked on this imperfect, sin-scarred Earth. One would imagine that being the Son of God, God in flesh, holy, blameless, Savior and Redeemer would get Jesus a "get-out-of-criticism-free" card. Heart-breakingly, no. The Pharisees stated that, "It is by the prince of demons that he drives out demons" (Matt. 9:34). In layman terms, they were accusing him of drawing his power from the devil. Matthew chapter 13 tells us that when He began teaching in His hometown, "they took offense at him" (verse 57). There are so many more references, but let us not forget the place that symbolizes all the pain, agony, criticism, torture that the Sinless One took on so that we sinners might live eternally with Him in Heaven. Let us not forget Calvary. Before and during the crucifixion, we read that these actions were taken against Jesus: "spit in his face", "struck him with their fists", "stripped him", "mocked him", "twisted together a crown of thorns and set it on his head", "struck him on the head again and again", and so much more, not to mention the nails that He willingly allowed them to drive into His hands and feet to crucify Him on a cross (Matt. 26, 27). 

What on Earth did HE do? 

Though those scriptures can certainly put our pain in perspective, they do not discount our hurts in the eyes of God. Psalm 56:8 reads, "You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book." He sees; He cares. I included those verses about Jesus's suffering not to say that ours is inconsequential, but so we can study how He dealt with attacks in His time here on Earth. 

1. He made alone time with God the Father a priority. "Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed." -Mark 1:35 

It does not have to be early morning, but it is so important to set aside time to be alone with God and hear His truth, especially when assaulted with criticism and lies. 

2. He responded to attacks with truth based on God's word. The most memorable occasion is in Matthew chapter 4 when Jesus was led into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. Jesus's response to every temptation was, "It is written..." followed by scripture quotes (v. 4, 7, 10). This is not to say that we should quote Bible verses to every "cat" who attacks us, but rather that it is enormously helpful to hold tight to God's Word and God's truth when faced with vicious words and lies. When necessary, God will enable us to respond verbally by "speaking the truth in love" (Ephesians 4:15), but knowing God's truth in our heart can assist us in holding our peace when that is needed as well. 

3. He forgave. Let's return to that old rugged cross once more. "Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." -Luke 23:34 Whew-wee! That is a tough one. Tough for me to write. Tough for me to live. If you are anything like me, tough for you to hear. This flesh of mine never has any desire to forgive those who hurt me. BUT this heart of mine that beats for Jesus wants so deeply to please Him and obey His commands. I know that if I ask Him to help me choose to get past my feelings, forgive, and move on, He will. Enormously difficult for this sinner, but entirely possible through my Savior. 

Prayer

Dear Lord, thank You that even though words can hurt, You can heal. Help us to speak blessings into the lives of others and forgive those that speak curses into ours. Thank You that You see our pain, You care about it, and You are always willing to walk us through it if we reach out and take Your hand. We love You, Lord. Thank You for loving us. In Jesus's name, Amen! 

P.S. No cats or mice were harmed in the making of this post. Though I am not a raving fan of either, no offense meant to them or their owners ;)